Monday, March 01, 2004

I'm A Loser, Baby, So Why Don't You Kill Me

I have never voted for somebody who ends up president in my twenty years of voting. I also am the kiss of death in other things. The Pittsburgh Pirates lost the playoffs in 1991 and 1992 because of me, and the Mariners have lost in the playoffs as well whenever I've watched them. I was forbidden to go to my college football or basketball games (well, as if I would anyway...) because of my well known loserdom. The interesting twist about last year's Red Sox was that I watched every inning of the last game until I channel surfed in the last extra inning. I just returned a split second after Aaron Boone's homerun. It was like the loser gods were playing me like a little kitten with a string - I didn't even get the catharsis of seeing the loss happen - I had to sit through several minutes of befuddlement (okay - a normal state in any case...) before I saw the replay of what happened, a first pitch homerun. (Yes, I was cheering for the Red Sox, rooting for the Yankees would be like cheering for Fastow in his Enron trials, and besides, would you EVER want to be on any side that had Steinbrenner on it?)

So that brings up my dilemma, do I not vote this year in the Presidential elections? Well, that is if there will be elections - there is a low but finite possibility that if the polls are not in Bush's favor and the October surprises do not work that something will come up to cancel the elections. There is so much money at stake for Bush's contributors that it would make good business sense to make the elections go away.

But if there are elections, do I vote for Bush to jinx him? Can I depend on my power? Can I count on twenty years of being a loser? Or would that just be the delicious irony - that Bush would win the State of Washington by one vote AND I was the reason for the next four years of lootocracy and random invasions.

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I.


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