Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Don't Mess Wid My Stereotypes!

Everyone lives in a huge, crass mini-mansion on the Sammamish Plateau with a three-car garage (for the other two family SUVs; the cleaning lady parks down the street). They're all NIMBY Republicans who couldn't care less about the environment, and they probably voted for Bush. A bland land of white-bread homogeneity, a soulless suburban cultural desert of false fronts and bad architecture that mask American Beauty-style family dysfunction. That's the way Seattleites tend to think of the Eastside.
Well, except that the last line should be rewritten as something like "This is a truth universally acknowledged." This came from the cover article in this week's Seattle Weekly. After this winning introduction the author attempts to deny the truths he just espoused. However, like all hypocrites, I will not have my stereotypes disabused. Is the Eastside still the home of Microsoft? Then it is still and will remain a soulless, suburban cultural desert of false fronts and bad architecture. My friend and I have a game to who can first say "Microsoft millionaire" when we see something in such godawful bad taste like a white Hummer, or a 10,000 square foot house of crass ugliness or an Expedition towing a cigarette boat. They may have oodles of money, but they will never have taste. At least that's what my protective shell o' stereotypes leads me to believe....


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