Thursday, January 22, 2004

Can't We Just Get Along?

In which I report on another of KIRO-TV's wonderful headlines on its website (I won't link because it will change in a few hours anyway, the article does not have the same headline as the front page leader, the website is

The headline in question: "Mars Rover Stops Communicating From Mars".

Well, didn't NASA read the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus? And now they're wondering why it isn't communicating? All I'm saying, is that once they send up some beer and a satellite link to ESPN, you'll be getting some communicating going on.

Do you wonder why we don't send much to Venus? Because the Russians once set a lander to the surface of Venus and apparently all they got was "Do you think it's too humid down here? Well, I do, I wonder who I should talk to about this. And these curtains on the lander? I just don't think they fit in with the clouds here, I'll take them back. I can't seem to get Oprah down here, Hello?!? Do these retro-rockets make me look fat? We never really talk anymore, it's always telemetry this and data that, tell me, what are you feeling?"

The Russians pulled the plug after a few days of this. Last reports from the lander confirm that it is periwinkle blue with a touch of magenta trim. And the window treatments are to die for.


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